My throat hurts

Good day.

Yesterday, we had to take Logan to the endocrinologist for his hypothyroidism.  While there, his doc and I discussed one of Logan's little problems.  (Mommy's sorry, Logan... I'm helping ppl learn...) We talked about...Logan's smaller than normal, um... winkis.  She told me it is normal for boys with down syndrome and there is something we can do to help out in that area- she then begins typing on her pc in his chart. This was dangerous, because she gave me time to think.  When I think, my mind goes zooooom, way out there in left field.  I immediately think, viagra?? He's a baby- and he doesn't need what Viagra dishes out. Then I pictured Swedish Made Penis Enlarging Pump? NO... he's not Austin Powers. She then looks up and says, "um, we can give him 3 shots of testosterone, 1 shot a month for 3 months."  I just said, "yeah, ok. Works for me." (of course, it works for me, I'm not the one getting the shots.)  I was perfectly happy with the way he was built... that way, when he comes of age, maybe he won't be able to use it.  ** side note: Most boys with DS are sterile**  So I am not worried about him getting a girl knocked up, I just don't want him to be a playa. These shots are meant to help with potty training.  When he sits on the potty ring, we never know where he's going to be shooting. Aww, my poor baby.  I will move on from that and say, that overall, we are VERY blessed or lucky that Logan doesn't have many of the issues many kids with DS face.  No heart issues, no bowel issues, he is quite advanced mentally and physically for their group.  He is above average on the DS growth chart, so another of my kids is going to be an Amazon like their mother.

While we were @ the docs, Hubs mentioned that Mazlyn needed new sandals (we just bought her some 2 months ago- she's gonna have huge feet like me. He then added, well, Logan does too. I then said we have to buy Caden a pair then because it's not fair.  The kids were not being great so I didn't want to take them to a store.  I decided to Internet shop for shoes.  I remembered seeing the cutest croc sandals for little girls and I figured that was the way to go.  I'm not a huge fan of them for me, but they are cute on little ones.  So, went to crocs.com and ordered the kids' shoes.  They each got a free jibbitz with the shoe.  Then I broke down  and bought Crocs for myself (EEEK!) I said I would never buy them, but a couple girls @ work have a very cute style and they said they were comfy. I then went scouring the Internet for promo codes.  I ended up getting 4 pairs of crocs and 3 jibbitz for 56.00!  The boys' were 19.99 and mine were only 14.99 and Mazzy's were 9.99. I got free shipping.  Oh, and I was a new email signer-upper so I got the boys' for 14.99 too.  I ended up using 3 promo codes.  How cool is that? Cheap. Cheap. Cheap.  http://www.crocs.com/ and the coupon sites were http://dealspl.us/crocs-coupons and of course I can't find the one I used.  I remember the codes were GABBY999, OLIVIA1499, and of course sign up for email coupons, and you will get an email with a code to receive 20% off of everything else.  Plus free shipping for a limited time and 1 jibbitz for each pair of boys/girls pair of crocs you buy.  (not a huge selection, but they are free.)  Just remember to add the jibbitz to the cart or you won't get them.



What else... I really need to clean my floors and organize my crafting stuff.  It's taking over my house.  I just don't have a good place to do my thang.  Hubs has his half of the basement, kids have their half of the basement, Logan has the whole house. Whimper.

As mentioned above, I'm trying to potty train Logan.  He's going to have a permanent potty ring on his butt because he has been sitting on the potty 85% of the day.  Is that child abuse?  I took a mirror and leaned it on the wall so he can watch himself, plus he can watch TV while he's sitting there.  He seems happy, but he's going to have 'roids for sure.

Why are Chris Rock's teeth so white?  Holy crap!  I could see my reflection in those bad boys.  I want super white teeth that glow in the dark.  They have to be veneers.  I'm jealous.

As of the end of this month, I am no longer going to be selling uppercase living.  It was good while it lasted, but I don't have the extra time to do open houses and no one has the cash flow to buy them. This bloggin' thing is fun, and even though I don't make $ doing it, it keeps me occupied, which is what UL was supposed to do for me (so I wouldn't go crazy.)

Well, I better get my kid off of the potty.  Ciao for now.

MEH

These are a few of my favorite things

I'm trying to take a more positive outlook on life since I am one of the most pessimistic people, ever.  I have decided to list things I like or I'm thankful for.  I will list everything I want in life and hopefully by being positive I will receive everything on my "want" list. I really doubt it will happen, though.  HA! Let's begin.
(BULLETS, YAY!!!!)

• my kids (only when they behave or are asleep)
• my husband (only when he isn't being a tool bucket)
• my mom (when she isn't calling me on the phone)
• my brother (from 1982-2009.. he's being a jerk ball now)
• Kristy the nurse (she gets Caden out of my hair for a while)
• Gma Gert (she likes to do laundry)
• Gpa (he likes to give me things)
• Carol (when she reminds me of bowling tourneys)
• Christi (she makes me laugh)
• Any other family I haven't mentioned
• The owner of the salon I work for.  (he's very understanding abt the boys and their issues)
• Dan's work (again, very understanding)
• Dan's work buddies/wives who make me laugh
• Fingernail polish
• Lawn mowers
• kleenex
• shampoo
• OSIS Mess up Hair goop (BEST STUFF... EVER)
• Texturizing shears
• Lady Gaga
• True Blood
• Nick Jr.

I'm sure there are more, but that would be incredibly boring.  Now for the stuff I want. GIMME GIMME GIMME

• A member's only jacket.  Seriously.  I want one.
• Girl tools, pink/black hammer, screwdriver, tool belts
• power tools.  Table saw, mider saw, nail gun, wet saw, belt sander... blah, blah, blah
• A newfoundland dog
• A new fence for the back yard
• $ for home repairs OR a new custom built ranch styled house.  I'm not picky.
• A permanent cleaning lady, personal assistant, trainer, and cook
• A book deal and/or reality show (seriously, my life is way cooler than the lame Duggers')
• A huge car, maybe a denali, suburban, or navigator.. OOOH or a Chevy Explorer Van. They are amazing.
• A RV so we can Road Trip!!!!
• HIV/AIDS/Cancer/MS/ALS/MD and every other horrible disease, all cured (please keep DS... the world wouldn't be the same without it.)
• Nurses, teachers, soldiers, cops, and firefighters get pay raises
• A career that I will love for the rest of my working life.
• to be an extra in a movie
• to record a song, not for the radio... just for me.
• smaller feet, hips, and thighs
• bigger boobs, higher IQ, and thicker hair
• to bowl a 700 series.

That is all. Good Day.

a whole bunch of nothing, really.

I have really nothing super dazzling to report. I just gave my aunt a perm at home (let's keep this on the down low, seein' as it's illegal in the OH...) anyhoosier, my fingers and house smell like rotting ass. You haven't smelled rotten ass? You wanna come by? Disgusting. We had a yard sale on Saturday which was a huge, monumental failure.  What, people? What the hell ya looking for? Whatever it is, I'm sure I have at least one of them around here somewhere and I need the money cause I'm B to the R to the O to the K to the POOR. What else....
hmm, what's your favorite food?  I don't really care, just trying to start a conversation.

I started in the new salon in Lewis Center.  I like it. It's different, still adjusting to the new personalities of my co-workers. I really miss my bestie though and she moved to Newark! EEEEK! Every time I get a best friend, they ditch me.  I must truly suck as a friend.  Throughout my life, I can only keep friends for a year, tops.  I hear people talk about how they have friends from elementary school.  How is that possible?  I just don't understand how to make friendship work. Is there a Friendship for Dummies book available? Or cliff's notes at least? I need help.

My pinkie finger hurts. I'm done for now.

Peace.

Top 12 most annoying ppl on T.V.

While watching 'The View' I have decided to put my top 12 most annoying people on t.v. on my sweet blog and I'm going to put my Top 12 sappy chick flicks on the back burner.

* Please note, that this is only my opinion... if you happen to love one of these annoying ppl, sorry to hurt your feelings... but you'll get over it, wimp.

12. Elisabeth Hasselbeck (she was my fav on survivor, but she talks way too much)
11. Glenn Beck
10. Rush Limbaugh (are you sensing a theme?)
9. Kim Kardashian
8. Anyone from the Jersey Shore, or any Real Housewives show
7. Tori Spelling
6. Paris Hilton
5. Speidi
4. Bryant Gumble
3. Judge Judy
2. The guy on 'Ghost Adventures'.. don't know his name, don't care to. ANNOYING!
1. Kelly Ripa, hear me out... I used to love her, but now she is so fake. She sips her water out of the coffee cop so gingerly, tosses her hair back with her thumb, and is just a big fakey-head. I want the old Kelly back.

What the hell, I'm just gonna throw this out there since I'm on a roll..

My top 12 sappy Chick Flicks
12. P.S. I love you
11. Ghost
10. Steel Magnolias
9. City of Angels
8. Boys on the Side
7. Stepmom
6. What Dreams May Come
5. Where the Heart Is.
4. A League of Their Own. (I cried in it, I swear.)
3. Beaches
2. Hope Floats
1. The Notebook

* I would also like to say that of all of these movies, my husband has taken me to 1. Just 1 and that was Hope Floats. Jerk-ball.

a list for y'all

I was downstairs playing Rockband 2 with my super stellar fake band, The Tranny Hookerz, and I got to thinking... I like to read what I have to write... a lot, therefore, y'all should enjoy reading what I have to write as well. If you don't, then why did you open this post, dip shit? Go away. I'll wait for you to "x" it out...

Ok, now that only cool ppl are left, I was thinking that I should start doing lists David Letterman style. But I can't do a TOP TEN list, it's been done. So since I'm a Buckeye, which is part of the Big Ten, which has 12 freaking teams in it (we CAN count, honestly), I thought, how 'bout a top 12 list. Good thinking, Megan. Thanks, ppl. Yay! Let's begin.

The Top 12 Movies I will NEVER see. Don't try to persude me otherwise, cause it's not going to happen. In no particular order, except for #1, cause that movie is the scariest movie EVER made.

12. Scarface
11. Star Wars
10. Star Trek
9. Rocky
8. Avatar
7. Bridges of Madison County
6. The Godfather
5. Bloodsport
4. Rambo
3. Texas Chainsaw Massacre
2. The Matrix
1. E.T.

Now that I got that off of my chest, I can rest easily. Tomorrow, maybe I will give you my top 12 chick flicks. Aren't you all sitting on pins and needles in anticipation? Yeah, you should be.

Ciao, homies.

No habla Espanol.

It has been year and a half (slight exaggeration) since I posted a blog so I guess I'll give you some more of my worthless banter. Plus my FB and childhood friend Scott, AKA former Jesus, mentioned that I needed to give this baby some much needed TLC (I HEART ACRONYMS), so here she blows (giggity). I also heart parentheses.

I recently returned home from El Paso, Texas. I went with some ladies to attempt to bowl in the USBA Women's Nationals Bowling Tournament. The bowling was horrible but the ice cream at the bowling arena... delicious. Although the ice cream was yumm-a-riffic, it was not the highlight of the trip. Since there were so many things that were eventful and way too much to write in paragraph form, I will present them in a bulleted format. Because I not only heart bullets, as well., but I'm freaking LAZY.

• The flight from some place in TX to El Paso, landed safely, but not before the pilot damn near steered the plane off of the runway.
• Upon entering the hotel, which was 6 blocks from Mexico, my bowling bag, with two 14 lbs balls in it, fell over onto my footsie.
• Joyce tried to steal my nose ring in the middle of the night. I found it later in the day on the bed, it must have been stuck on the butt of her pajama pants. What the hell her ass was doing on my nose, I'll never know.
• We encountered the coolest casino shuttle driver and Mexican-American ever, Alfredo. Who gave us a tour of the dazzling, clean, and beautiful (HUGE EXAGGERATION) Juarez Meh-i-co. OK, so I'm not sure if Alfredo was Mexican-American, I'm assuming. I'm "James Frey-in" it up for ya. Don't know who James Frey is? Well, google it.
• I lost 40 bucks in a stupid slot machine.
• I lost way more than that entering stupid bowling brackets just to lose.
• We were stranded for over 2 hours (sadly, not an exaggeration) at The Saddleblanket Store or as we lovingly named it, The Saddlebags Store, since our shitty hotel shuttle forgot us yet kept lying about it.
• Denise, Tina, Peggy, and I ventured down to the freaking border of Mexico on a quest for El Paso t-shirts. We eventually found some, but not before finding: a.) a pair of Elephant styled man-thongs AKA Slong-Thongs, b.) a dude asking for a "tauter" so he could take the bus, and c.) 1-5 people who actually spoke English. Thank the Lord for Mr. Shannon Morris... or I would have been screwed!
• I lost 40 more smackers in slots, but Marge and I partnered up and since she's the luckiest woman in the world (NOT AN EXAGGERATION), I ended up 10 ahead. Yay me!
• Alfredo or "Freddy" to his bitches, took us to the border to see my hard-working, just looking for a better life, Mexican hombres being stifled by "The Man" and not being allowed into U.S. soil. That being said, he also showed us the gobs of border patrol who were putting their lives on the line to keep our borders safe from the not-so-my-hombres, Mexican, shit-bags who want to bring in all of their black tar and ruin our lives. ** No fear, my children... because America has one hard-hitting law man on their side...I say this bc that rent-a-cop who was staring us down the entire time was super intimidating.
• I left my damn wallet in Freddy's shuttle.
• ** the following bullet WILL contain grammatical errors. Hell, I'm sure the whole thing is filled with 'em, but again... MEGAN IS LAZY. Anyhoo.....Freddy saved the day and drove all the way back from New Mexico with my wallet. Just to be a gentleman, he said, "check it and make sure every thing's in there." To him, I replied, "you haven't picked anyone up yet, have you?" "No.", said Freddy. "Aw, then we're cool, man." I added. Followed by a, "YOU ARE AWESOME, FREDDY!" and a hefty $5 tip, which in Mexico, I'm sure is like $7.50.
• I sucked AGAIN and lost MORE Freaking money bowling. ** I'm not quite sure if this event is posted in chronological order as my sucking at bowling seems to run together sometimes.
• We left El Sucko, TX on Sunday, when it was a chilly 107 degrees. ** The following day, a 14-year-old boy was killed by a Border Patrol Agent near the border. The little douche- head was throwing stones at the agent. What were you thinking, nino? They have GUNS!
• On the flight from St. Louis to Cbus, a former NFL player sat beside Gail and I and talked our ears off. He was a humble gentleman and cool as hell (he let it slip that he played in the NFL which I think embarrassed him, maybe thinking we would assume he was trying to be the bomb-diggity) and Joyce was super jealous of our new boyfriend.

In summation, all-in-all, a pretty fun trip. We have fun together, but by the last day, a few of us are ready to pull each other's hair out. Thank baby Jesus that Becky was there to keep everyone sane!
Are your eyes tired yet? No? Well, here we go with some more gibberish....
After returning home from Mexico, I mean, El Paso, I had to get my foot checked out. I thought for sure it was fractured, but the doc said I had 2 bruised bones. My mom, AKA Laura, didn't know you could bruise bones. I said, "Me not know." I'm not Gregory House for Pete's sake.
I started working at the salon in Polaris. It's about the same time to travel as the salon in Marion, but less mileage which means less gas for me. Or does it? I'm not Cooter Davenport for Pete's sake. I must say, though, I will miss the girls from the Marion salon and the regulars but the tips are so much better in Po-Ris.
I have been out of my ADHD (SEE BOOK LISTED ABOVE, A must read for ADHDers) meds for a few days now and I'm withdrawing. Kroger pharmacy is only 1/5 of a mile away, but ya know... LA-ZY. Plus it's hard to remember things when you have ADHD and you aren't on your meds (which are used to help your brain work properly...duh.) I probably should get on that ASAP. Where the hell are my post-it notes? Where the hell is a pen? I.HATE.MY.LIFE. OMG, I'm on a computer- let me type a reminder note. BRB. (Begins typing. {Megan, remember to get your ADHD and anxiety medicine.} Ends typing.) OK, I'm back. Thanks for your patience.
I'm sorry for my craziness in this blog. I'm giddy-tired due to the fact that I have been awake since 4 am, because Logan peed on my leg thanks to a diaper that was not placed onto the baby butt properly. Oh... well, I guess this enough blogging for one day. I'm getting calluses on my whittle, itty, bitty fingders. So until the next big thing happens in my boring ass life.....
Gracias, Ropa, Rojo, and Adios. *I know I totally just said Thanks, Clothes, Red, and Bye. I did it on purpose. Haven't you grasped my sense of humor yet? FOR PETE'S SAKE!
Megooners
PICS OF EL PASO TO FOLLOW.